Sex Education for Men
What is sex education?
Sex education, which is sometimes
called sexuality education or sex and relationships
education, is the process of acquiring information and
forming attitudes and beliefs about sex, sexual
identity, relationships and intimacy. Sex education is
also about developing young people's skills so that they
make informed choices about their behaviour, and feel
confident and competent about acting on these choices.
It is widely accepted that young people have a right to
sex education, partly because it is a means by which
they are helped to protect themselves against abuse,
exploitation, unintended pregnancies, sexually
transmitted diseases and HIV/AIDS.
What are the aims of sex education?
Sex education seeks both to reduce
the risks of potentially negative outcomes from sexual
behaviour, like unwanted or unplanned pregnancies and
infection with sexually transmitted diseases, and to
enhance the quality of relationships. It is also about
developing young people's ability to make decisions over
their lifetime. Sex education that works, by which we
mean that it is effective is sex education that
contributes to this overall aim.
What skills should sex
education develop?
If sex education is going to be
effective it needs to include opportunities for young
people to develop skills, as it can be hard for them to
act on the basis of only having information.6 7 The
skills young people develop as part of sex education are
linked to more general life-skills. Being able to
communicate, listen, negotiate, ask for and identify
sources of help and advice, are useful life-skills and
can be applied in terms of sexual relationships.
Effective sex education develops young people's skills
in negotiation, decision-making, assertion and
listening. Other important skills include being able to
recognize pressures from other people and to resist
them, dealing with and challenging prejudice and being
able to seek help from adults - including parents,
careers and professionals - through the family, community
and health and welfare services. Sex education that
works also helps equip young people with the skills to
be able to differentiate between accurate and inaccurate
information, and to discuss a range of moral and social
issues and perspectives on sex and sexuality, including
different cultural attitudes and sensitive issues like
sexuality, abortion and contraception.
Forming attitudes and beliefs
Young people can be exposed to a
wide range of attitudes and beliefs in relation to sex
and sexuality. These sometimes appear contradictory and
confusing. For example, some health messages emphasize
the risks and dangers associated with sexual activity
and some media coverage promotes the idea that being
sexually active makes a person more attractive and
mature. Because sex and sexuality are sensitive
subjects, young people and sex educators can have strong
views on what attitudes people should hold, and what
moral framework should govern people's behavior these
too can sometimes seem to be at odds. Young people are
very interested in the moral and cultural frameworks
that binds sex and sexuality. They often welcome
opportunities to talk about issues where people have
strong views, like abortion, sex before marriage,
lesbian and gay issues and contraception and birth
control. It is important to remember that talking in a
balanced way about differences in opinion does not
promote one set of views over another, or mean that one
agrees with a particular view. Part of exploring and
understanding cultural, religious and moral views is
finding out that you can agree to disagree.
Attempts to impose narrow
moralistic views about sex and sexuality on young people
through sex education have failed.
Providing sex education have
attitudes and beliefs of their own about sex and
sexuality and it is important not to let these influence
negatively the sex education that they provide. For
example, even if a person believes that young people
should not have sex until they are married, this does
not imply withholding important information about safer
sex and contraception. Attempts to impose narrow
moralistic views about sex and sexuality on young people
through sex education have failed. Rather than trying to
deter or frighten young people away from having sex,
effective sex education includes work on attitudes and
beliefs, coupled with skills development, that enables
young people to choose whether or not to have a sexual
relationship taking into account the potential risks of
any sexual activity.
Effective sex education also
provides young people with an opportunity to explore the
reasons why people have sex, and to think about how it
involves emotions, respect for one self and other people
and their feelings, decisions and bodies. Young people
should have the chance to explore gender differences and
how ethnicity and sexuality can influence people's
feelings and options. They should be able to decide for
themselves what the positive qualities of relationships
are. It is important that they understand how bullying,
stereotyping, abuse and exploitation can negatively
influence relationships.
So what information should be given to young people?
Young people get information about
sex and sexuality from a wide range of sources including
each other, through the media including advertising,
television and magazines, as well as leaflets, books and
websites) which are intended to be sources of
information about sex and sexuality. Some of this will
be accurate and some inaccurate. Providing information
through sex education is therefore about finding out
what young people already know and adding to their
existing knowledge and correcting any misinformation
they may have. For example, young people may have heard
that condoms are not effective against HIV/AIDS or that
there is a cure for AIDS. It is important to provide
information which corrects mistaken beliefs. Without
correct information young people can put themselves at
greater risk.
Information is also important as the basis on which young people can
developed well- informed attitudes and views about sex and
sexuality. Young people need to have information on all the
following topics:
1-Sexual development
2-Reproduction
3-Contraception
4-Relationships
They need to have information about
the physical and emotional changes associated with
puberty and sexual reproduction, including fertilization
and conception and about sexually transmitted diseases,
including HIV/AIDS. They also need to know about
contraception and birth control including what
contraceptives there are, how they work, how people use
them, how they decide what to use or not, and how they
can be obtained. In terms of information about
relationships they need to know about what kinds of
relationships there are, about love and commitment,
marriage and partnership and the law relating to sexual
behavior and relationships as well as the range of
religious and cultural views on sex and sexuality and
sexual diversity. In addition, young people should be
provided with information about abortion, sexuality, and
confidentiality, as well as about the range of sources
of advice and support that is available in the community
and nationally.
When should sex education start?
Sex education that works starts
early, before young people reach puberty, and before
they have developed established patterns of behavior.
The precise age at which information should be provided
depends on the physical, emotional and intellectual
development of the young people as well as their level
of understanding. What is covered and also how, depends
on who is providing the sex education, when they are
providing it, and in what context, as well as what the
individual young person wants to know about.
It is important not to delay
providing information to young people but to begin when
they are young. Providing basic information provides the
foundation on which more complex knowledge is built up
over time. This also means that sex education has to be
sustained. For example, when they are very young,
children can be informed about how people grow and
change over time, and how babies become children and
then adults, and this provides the basis on which they
understand more detailed information about puberty
provided in the pre-teenage years. They can also when
they are young, be provided with information about
viruses and germs that attack the body. This provides
the basis for talking to them later about infections
that can be caught through sexual contact.
Providing basic information
provides the foundation on which more complex knowledge
is built up over time.
Some people are concerned that
providing information about sex and sexuality arouses
curiosity and can lead to sexual experimentation.
However, in a review of 48 studies of comprehensive sex
and STD/HIV education programmers in US schools, there
was found to be strong evidence that such programmers did
not increase sexual activity. Some of them reduced
sexual activity, or increased rates of condom use or
other contraceptives, or both. It is important to
remember that young people can store up information
provided at any time, for a time when they need it later
on.
Sometimes it can be difficult for
adults to know when to raise issues, but the important
thing is to maintain an open relationship with children
which provides them with opportunities to ask questions
when they have them. Parents and careers can also be
proactive and engage young people in discussions about
sex, sexuality and relationships. Naturally, many
parents and their children feel embarrassed about
talking about some aspects of sex and sexuality. Viewing
sex education as an on-going conversation about values,
attitudes and issues as well as providing facts can be
helpful. The best basis to proceed on is a sound
relationship in which a young person feels able to ask a
question or raise an issue if they feel they need to. It
has been shown that in countries like The Netherlands,
where many families regard it as an important
responsibility to talk openly with children about sex
and sexuality, this contributes to greater cultural
openness about sex and sexuality and improved sexual
health among young people.
The role of many parents and careers
as sex educators changes as young people get older and
young people are provided with more opportunities to
receive formal sex education through schools and
community-settings. However, it doesn't get any less
important. Because sex education in school tends to take
place in blocks of time, it can't always address issues
relevant to young people at a particular time, and
parents can fulfill a particularly important role in
providing information and opportunities to discuss
things as they arise.
Who should provide sex education?
Different settings provide
different contexts and opportunities for sex education.
At home, young people can easily have one-to-one
discussions with parents or careers which focus on
specific issues, questions or concerns. They can have a
dialogue about their attitudes and views. Sex education
at home also tends to take place over a long time, and
involve lots of short interactions between parents and
children. There may be times when young people seem
reluctant to talk, but it is important not to interpret
any diffidence as meaning that there is nothing left to
talk about. As young people get older advantage can be
taken of opportunities provided by things seen on
television for example, as an opportunity to initiate
conversation. It is also important not to defer dealing
with a question or issue for too long as it can suggest
that you are unwilling to talk about it.
In school the interaction between
the teacher and young people takes a different form and
is often provided in organized blocks of lessons. It is
not as well suited to advising the individual as it is
to providing information from an impartial point of
view. The most effective sex education acknowledges the
different contributions each setting can make. School
programmer which involve parents, notifying them what is
being taught and when, can support the initiation of
dialogue at home.
In some countries, the involvement
of young people themselves in developing and providing
sex education has increased as a means of ensuring the
relevance and accessibility of provision. Consultation
with young people at the point when programmers are
designed, helps ensure that they are relevant and the
involvement of young people in delivering programmers may
reinforce messages as they model attitudes and behavior
to their peers.
Formal programmers with these
elements have been shown to increase young people's
levels of knowledge about sex and sexuality, put back
the average age at which they first have sexual
intercourse and decrease risk when they do have sex. All
the elements are important and inter-related, and sex
education needs to be supported by links to sexual
health services, otherwise it is not going to be so
effective. It also takes into account the messages about
sexual values and behavior young people get from other
sources, like friends and the media. It is also
responsive to the needs of the young people themselves -
whether they are girls or boys, on their own or in a
single sex or mixed sex group, and what they know
already, their age and experiences.
Taking sex education forward
Providing effective sex education
can seem daunting because it means tackling potentially
sensitive issues. However, because sex education
comprises many individual activities, which take place
across a wide range of settings and periods of time,
there are lots of opportunities to contribute.
The nature of a person's
contribution depends on their relationship, role and
expertise in relation to young people. For example,
parents are best placed in relation to young people to
provide continuity of individual support and education
starting from early in their lives. School-based
education programmers are particularly good at providing
information and opportunities for skills development and
attitude clarification in more formal ways, through
lessons within a curriculum. Community-based projects
provide opportunities for young people to access advice
and information in less formal ways. Sexual health and
other health and welfare services can provide access to
specific information, support and advice. Sex education
through the mass media, often supported by local,
regional or national Government and non-governmental
agencies and departments, can help to raise public
awareness of sex health issues.
Because sex education can take
place across a wide range of settings, there are lots of
opportunities to contribute.
Further development of sex
education partly depends on joining up these elements in
a coherent way to meet the needs of young people. There
is also a need to pay more attention to the needs of
specific groups of young people like young parents,
young lesbian, gay and bisexual people, as well as those
who may be out of touch with services and schools and
socially vulnerable, like young refugees and
asylum-seekers, young people in care, young people in
prisons, and also those living on the street.
The circumstances and context
available to parents and other sex educators are
different from place to place. Practical or political
realities in a particular country may limit people's
ability to provide young people with comprehensive sex
education combining all the elements in the best way
possible. But the basic principles outlined here apply
everywhere. By making our own contribution and valuing
that made by others, and by being guided by these
principles, we can provide more sex education that works
and improve the support we offer to young people.
